Praying for the Offender

There have been times in my life where God reminded me to pray for those who have hurt me, offended me and ignited anger in my heart. In those times, when I obeyed the Holy Spirits prompting for me to pray for the unlovable, sometimes I felt like a hypocrite, a liar because as I prayed, I still felt ill will towards them. 

I continued daily to pray for the one that ignited negative emotion within me. Through that obedience to pray for the enemy so to speak, to bless the enemy and to pray for a transformation, something happened. He not only changed the offender, but more importantly he also changed my response both physically and emotionally concerning the offender and the offense. Pretty soon, the prayers were answered. The relationship was restored, repaired and renewed to something that it was never before. 

Sometimes this does not happen, nor do you want restoration but inner peace through forgiveness heals the broken part of your spirit. No longer do you live in anger, fear or whatever emotion that was tied to that event or person. 

I remember one time I was entering a party where I would see this person again that had “crossed” a line with me. I knew there would be a coldness in the air, unfinished businesses of unsettled emotions looming, last words of a disagreement still standing in the staleness of the air. As I turned the knob to go into the party, the Holy Spirit said, ” Shea, sit next to her at dinner. ” 

” Ah, seriously, that is so uncomfortable?”  In obedience and uncomfortableness, I scanned the room for the person and there was an open chair at the table. In my spirit, with my head slightly down looking at the floor I walked towards that empty chair in my spirit, in obedience to my Father, I said ” Yes, Sir. “

I pulled out the chair, sat next to her and began asking her questions about her life, small talk. Then, the next morning, God told me to ask her to go for a walk. ” Really? ” 

” Yes, really. ” 

In my thoughts, I thought she might not even go with you. Just do as your told, Shea!

” Yes, Sir. ” 

I asked her to go for a walk and through small talk we just moved past the offense. 

There was a time not long ago that I found out that I was not invited to a party because I am vegetarian. It hurt my feelings. It wasn’t that I really wanted to go, but it was because the person said I was not invited because I was too difficult, different, not worth it. I could have easily not eaten anything. I could have brought vegetarian side items or appetizers that were vegetarian. I felt hurt. How could someone use my child to clean up for a party, then insulted her family by saying, “Your family is not invited because they are vegetarian. ”   I felt less than, like an unwanted outcast and hurt for my daughter. 

I had always been nice to this person. I went out of my way to be friendly, conversational. Then, she is so hurtful.

In my irritation and hurt feelings, the Holy Spirit reminded me. ” Shea, remember that Jesus was invited to a party. He was treated poorly when he got there. He did not have his feet washed nor was he given fragrance oil to freshen up. Then, when he got there inside, they insulted him verbally too. Pray for her. But know that I understand.” 

What I am saying is that people will hurt you deeply. Some do not know that they hurt you at all; they are oblivious to the impact. Jesus was betrayed by those he loved. He was abandoned and rejected by some of his best friends. He was mocked, spit on, verbally and physically abused. He was pursued by those in the community regarded as religious and who held “status. ” 

Yahshua understands all the emotions you are feeling. But as believers we are called to be more than, not less than. We are called to let our light shine regardless. We must pray for those who offend and hurt us. We must take it one step further and ask the Father to transform the lost and to bless those who have persecuted us with a deeper relationship with their Messiah. Pray for restoration, transformation, repair and pray against the spirits that drive unhealthy emotion like: resentment, division, animosity and anger. 

Jesus makes it clear that we are to forgive people over and over. We are called to give grace when grace is not deserved. We are called to be friendly to the unfriendly and to love the unlovable. We are called to be kind, to smile, to be helpful. Before we ever ask for anything from God, we are to forgive and get right with our brothers and sisters.  Our forgiveness is tied to our forgiveness to others. It’s non-negotiable. 

Ask God to help you be more than…to help you hand over the luggage, unforgiveness, anger, hurt etc that is pulling your spirit down. 

It’s not easy. But we have to lead with love, kindness and forgiveness. 

” Forgive them, they know not what they do. ” 

Even with those that hate, deceive and manipulate… Vengeance is not to be ours.  Pray for them. Lead with Love and let Abba Daddy do the discipline and lessons.